You Get What You Pay For

Recently a friend of mine asked for help in finding hotel rooms for a first time visit to Switzerland.   I recommended she contact a travel agent who I knew was originally from Switzerland and would be a wealth of information.

The agent recommended several hotels and booked them rooms.   When I asked her about the experience of working with the travel agent she was very complimentary of his knowledge but said “You know he was charging me more than the rate available on the internet.”

I would have expected to pay a little more when working with a travel agent then trying to do the bookings on my own.  The time saved alone would be worth it to me.  Working directly with people is expensive.  It’s why almost every business in the US has automated phone systems.  I’m all for  keeping costs down but sometimes I just want to talk to a company representative rather than search the website’s FAQ section or spend time pressing phone buttons and still not getting the info I need.

So what’s it worth to you to take advantage of someone’s expertise?  Travel is one of those areas where it’s worth it to pay a little more to get the piece of mind to know that you’re not going to be sleeping on a cot in a non air conditioned hotel in the worst section of an unfamiliar city.   I can read all I want online, however, talking to an expert travel agent who’s been there/done that helps me to know that the money I’m spending on a vacation is going to be worth it.

As an example, my husband vacationed in Puerta Vallarta, Mexico last winter.   I did some online research and did all my own bookings.  Had I consulted with an experienced travel agent we would have known that it’s almost impossible to get out of the airport without being hassled to take a timeshare tour.  We would have known what the peso to dollar conversion rate should have been.  We would have known not to take the whale watching tour and we would have had recommendations for restaurants.  For all of that I would have gladly paid a premium for someone’s expertise.

“…..  But she’s got a great personality!”

In the last 5 years I have been very fortunate to work with some of the best photographers in the USA let alone NJ.  At one wedding the photographer was very concerned that the bride didn’t have the type of  personality he needs to make his photos work.  “You know me Kath” he said, “I need personality, someone who’s going to relax and let go.  You know how I work.”   At the time I knew what he meant – the bride was a little stiff.  However, being the pro that he is, he worked well with what he had and the pictures were amazing.

His comments got me to thinking about how the personality AND style of  your wedding photographer should match YOUR personality and style.  Say you’re looking at samples of a photographer’s work and you see some photos that you like.  Think about what those subjects had to do to get that shot (“OK John lean in like you’re going to kiss her but don’t kiss her – hold it right there.  No, don’t close your eyes, look right at her but softly – don’t blink.  Sorry, I know the sun is in your eyes….   Hold it, hold it.  Good!!”).  Some great shots are done without the subjects knowing there’s a camera anywhere near them.  Others are  set up and made to look like no one was holding a camera anywhere near them.  Are you willing to do what it takes to get that shot done??

Right now I have a core group of photographers that are my “go to” shooters.    Each one has a different personality and photographic style.    Tell me what type of person you are and what kind of photos you’re looking for and I’m confident I can find the right photographer for you at the right price.

Your photographer is going to be with you all day.  Make sure the person behind the camera is someone you want to spend that much time with  otherwise it’s going to be a really L O N G day for everyone and both of you might not like the results.

Tweet, Tweet, Tweet

I am going to be amongst those telling my grandchildren that Twitter was new when I first got onto to it and that I remember when Facebook was for college students only.  They will look at me like I have two heads.  I’m slowly getting the hang of Twitter.  I find it to be a cyber abyss similar to links on the internet – one leads to another and before you know it an hour has gone by and I have no idea why.

I am becoming competitive with my social networking – “become a fan” on Facebook; “follow me” on Twitter.  I will my numbers to go up each day as I search for relevant content.  I try to come up with unique ideas that I find in the (what seems like) hundreds of trade related magazines I read each month or post info about new professionals and trends in the wedding and event industry that I think might be worth noting.

I bring an old fashioned approach to my work as an event planner and I think I have an old fashioned view of social networking.  Bring some value and experience while keeping content relevant not boring and not too personal.   Really??  Who cares what I do all day??

So if you’ve got the time – become a fan of All the Best Wedding & Celebrations on Facebook or follow @ATBWeddings on Twitter.  Let me know if you like what I post and if you have any suggestions for new posts.

What Just Happened??

Last Friday I attempted to load a security software suite that had been charged to my account monthly for almost a year but had not yet been installed.  Something went horribly wrong during the installation and my entire hard drive was virtually wiped out.  No one from tech support knows what happened (“this has never happened before”).  Fortunately I have an external back up and was able to restore the majority of my files with the exception of e-mail.   It appears that I’m missing about one year’s worth of information including all the dates stored on my calendar.  It has taken me four days to restore what I know to have been lost.  The rest will be done as I go along and realize something’s missing.

As a wedding planner I am the external back up for my clients.   The list of services we provide is extensive, however, the best planned event can still have a glitch or two.  If you don’t have an event coordinator – who’s going to handle those glitches for you on your wedding day??

I have consulted with a few clients who have decided not to use my services for a variety of reasons.  I have heard stories after the event was over that includes the groom missing the entire cocktail hour because their DJ showed up with an iPod and no play list.  Or the venue that can host more than one event at a time and got the passed hors d’oeurves mixed up for two events  so that each got the others food.   Then there was the bride who wanted to control every last detail which caused her to be 2 hours late for her pre-ceremony pictures which then delayed her ceremony by almost an hour  which then caused her to have to pay for overtime so that her reception wasn’t cut short.  The list goes on and on.

A wedding is a once in a lifetime experience.  Don’t be caught wondering “what just happened?” without a good back up.  If you’re not going to hire an event coordinator then designate someone not involved with the wedding party to take care of any issues that might pop up.   Most weddings go off without any glitches – have your back up ready just in case!

A Celebration of Life!!

Tina and Bob

All the Best had the privilege of working with Tina and Bob while they were planning their September 2009 wedding.  They had been dating for quite some time and they were both excited to be married.  They chose a site on the beach because the ocean is very special to both of them.  They are both merchant marine captains whose fathers were both merchant marine captains.

Shortly after we started working together Tina told me that Bob had been diagnosed with cancer.  In no way did this slow either of them down – full speed ahead went the planning!  We chose a venue and they found a church nearby.  Photographer, DJ, and florist were chosen while Tina was on leave from her ship.  When she was in captain mode we communicated by e-mail and cell phone.  Bob’s treatment was on going and when one therapy didn’t work Tina researched and found others.

It was so easy and fun to work with them.   Tina knew exactly what she did and did not want.   She chose carnations for most of their flowers because Bob liked them.  The DJ went out of his way to find a particular sailing song that while solemn was one they both liked.

Their love and faith in each other never waivered and Tina always had something positive to say.  Bob even planned his therapy around the wedding so he would feel as well as possible on the big day.  Family and friends traveled from near and far in order to celebrate with the happy couple!  As a testament to his sense of humor Bob had a “NIC (not under command)” symbol on the sole of his shoe that all could see when he knelt during the ceremony.  At the end of the day both bride and groom were very happy with the way their day had gone.  We at All the Best were proud to have been a part of it all.

Tina called yesterday to tell me that Bob had passed away on Thursday after a 3 year battle with cancer.  She also told me to tell the photographer that she would be in touch to order her wedding album and would be using some of the proofs at his memorial.  She and Bob had picked out the pictures.  I am  devastated.  I can only imagine how Tina feels.  They were married for just about 5 1/2 months.

So the next bride who gets upset because something ridiculously small happened to cause her day not to be perfect will hear the story of Tina and Bob.  A life together cut short because of a deadly disease that no amount of planning or detailed lists could make perfect.

Tina seemed to be at peace knowing that Bob was not suffering any more.  My heart goes out to her and the members of Bob’s family.  He was a great guy who loved Tina and will be missed by all who knew him.

Let’s Go Shopping!!

I have a client who bought her dress, accessories, and bridesmaids dresses from a nationally known wedding dress shop.   I am working with her to try to return an accessory item that she purchased months ago that turns out to be too big for her to use.   No one at the shop gave her any advice as to what might be a good fit for her – she picked everything out, paid for it and walked out of the store.  After striking out with the store manager and a corporate customer service manager I am now waiting to hear from the district manager.

Apparently “no” and “can’t” are big words in their vocabulary.  No they can’t take back the item since it was purchased months ago.  No they can’t take back the item – it’s been discontinued.  No they can’t take back the item – the sales receipt is stamped all sales are final.  No they can’t issue a store credit – if they do it for me what will they do for everyone else that they say “no” to everyday???

I really don’t care what they can’t do for anyone else – my concern is for my client.  IMHO it’s not that they “can’t” do it – policy, shmolicy – it’s that they won’t do it.  To me the answer is really a no brainer – issue some kind of credit so she can get something else and not go to another store (and have her wedding planner blog to the world about the poor customer service!).

I had a consultation the other day with a lovely bride who is in the process of looking for her wedding dress.  She had already been to one of my favorite local salons (and this one I will name) – The Barefoot Bride in Fair Haven, NJ.   She was hesitant to buy the dress and thought she would look at other shops.  The friend that was with her told her – “you are not going to find service like that at another shop.  Trust me!”  Mayra has helped dress a few of my brides and their wedding parties.  She and her staff go out of their way to provide the kind of service that brides want (and deserve). You would think that because of their location that their prices are high.  I can assure you that have a wide range of price points – I had one bride who paid $800 for her dress several years ago.  It was a gorgeous beaded strapless dress that fit her perfectly – she looked so beautiful in it!

The bride’s wedding dress sets the tone for the wedding.  It’s one of the most important choices she will make for her wedding day.  Why shop at a place whose policy includes “no we can’t” instead of “of course we can” or “we’ll do our best to get that done for you?”  Do your research – ask your friends where they got their dress and would they go back there again; read the message boards online; ask your wedding planner; check with the local Better Business Bureau or Chamber of Commerce.  Make an appointment, see how they treat you.  If you don’t like it – move on!  There are plenty of other shops out there with the “can do” attitude!  Find the one that’s right for you.

It IS What you Know!

Today I arrived in Indianapolis to attend my first Association of Bridal Consultants Annual Fall Conference.  My seat mate on the plane was a very nice man who is an education consultant to school districts throughout the US who have more students that are failing then are passing.  His career includes 22 years as a classroom teacher and he told me that he stills reads and studies constantly.  “Every good teacher ” he told me “is always learning.”  After observing in the classrooms, he works out a plan that is specific to each district, then he guides the team of teachers and administrators through the implementation process for his action plan.  In one of his districts the 7th graders went from having the lowest math scores in the district to among the highest.

As we were getting off the plane I realized that our work processes are very similar.  Granted, I’m not raising the education level of our nation’s youth, however, guiding clients through the process of planning their wedding is truly a milestone in their lives.  After a consultation with my clients I put my education and 25+ years of experience to work.  An action plan is formulated which is then implemented by guiding my clients and their family and friends through the process.

I still get a thrill when I learn something new.  That will never get old.  I’m looking forward to taking advantage of all this conference has to offer and to participating in other conferences, classes, and networking opportunities as they become available throughout my career as an event planner.  The more I can bring to the table for my clients, the better!!

Is it Better in the Bahamas?

I have been a Certified Sandals Specialist since 2005, however, I had never actually been to a Sandals property.  When the offer came to update my certification at the Sandals Royal Bahamian Resort I jumped at the chance.  Three days in the Caribbean at an all-inclusive resort; no cell phone, no computer.  I couldn’t wait to go!

My previous vacation trips to the Bahamas had been “OK” experiences so I was prepared for this trip to be just OK as well.  Having been a traveler when I had a corporate job and having been on my share of vacations I know not to get too excited before I reach my destination as you never know what you’re going to find at a place you’ve never been.

Let me tell you why this trip to Sandals Royal Bahamian was more than just OK and why I’ll be renewing my Sandals certification at a different resort each year!

After a 45 minute flight from Miami I arrived at the airport in Nassau (HINT:  You’ll need a passport.  Allow plenty of time to apply for a new one or to update the one you already have).  I went through Immigration (the flight attendants will give you a form) then found the Sandals desk on the baggage claim level (HINT:  keep the page they give you in a safe place – there’s a safe in your room – you’ll need it when you leave).  At the desk I was greeted by 3 (count them 3) Sandals representatives who told me where to go to wait for the shuttle that would take me to the resort.  A group gathered to wait for the shuttle which arrived as promised; we got on, waited a few minutes for stragglers, then off we went.  The driver was like a tour guide along the way showing us places of interest during the 15 minute drive.  They drive on the opposite side in the Bahamas so don’t freak out!

When we got to the resort we were greeted by a bell captain who took our names and indicted where each of us should go for registration (there might be a colored dot on your luggage tag to help with that process).  Once on site you don’t touch your luggage – it will be brought to your room once it’s ready.  (HINT:  Bring a carry on with your bathing suits, hats, and suntan products <3 oz or smaller> or get them out of your suitcase before you go to registration – if you’re room is not ready they have places to get changed so you can relax while you’re waiting).  A lovely woman offering a glasses of champagne or rum punch came around seconds later.  About the same time

Your butler can arrange a romantic dinner on your private balcony!

we arrived a Rolls Royce pulled up with newlyweds who were smiling from ear to ear!  The Mercedes and its well dressed driver were just sitting there waiting to run to the airport. (HINT:  The Rolls Royce and Mercedes are available to Butler Service level guests.  While expensive – this level of service comes with lots of perks including your own private butler, dinners at Gordon’s on the Pier, and 24 hour room service).

While at the airport I was VERY fortunate to meet Kay – a Sandals booking agent based in Miami.  She couldn’t have been nicer and gave me a complete run down of the property before we arrived.  I followed her like a puppy!

She took me to lunch while we waited for our rooms to be ready (check in is usually at 3:00pm and we arrived at about 12:30pm).  She asked me where I’d like to eat as there are several choices.  I chose the Cassanova Buffet Restaurant over the Bella Napoli Pizzeria (where you can make your own pizza and eat it overlooking the beach) or the Royal Cafe (where you can get salads or grilled items).  Cassanova offered a wide variety of foods including a made to order pasta station and lots of fresh fruit.  Wait staff brings your beverages.

The 4 poster bed is very comfortable - turn down service includes his and her bathrobes

After lunch we went back to registration and our rooms were ready! As we walked over to The Windsor Building (vs The Manor Building or The Villas)  Kay started to explain to me about all the different types of rooms.  While I can’t tell you all of them (I’ll hook you up with her when you’re ready to book!) I can tell you that you want a Concierge level or higher room.  Concierge rooms come with a full bar (at no extra charge) and beautiful views.  My junior suite on the 5th floor was very spacious with a soaking tub in the bathroom, separate seating area, armoire with TV (most channels are based out of Miami) and great views of the pool and the ocean.  We were left on our own until our first group meeting at dinner in the Crystal Room later that evening.  Since I had a 6:00am flight out of Newark I was tired (and full) and took a nap!

We were a diverse group of ABC members from NJ, TN, LA, IN, FL and 3

Everyone who attended the training was a member of the ABC.

wedding planners from the Bahamas.  A nicer group of people you’ll never meet.  Dinner was delicious – the menu had been chosen for us and it did not disappoint.  Crab claws, shrimp, conch and oysters for an appetizer; steak and lobster tail for dinner; and bananas foster for dessert.  Wine service was continuous and I understand the Goombay Smash was a refreshing drink.  Our wait staff was very attentive and we could see that the dining room was full of happy couples.  (HINT:  Long pants and collared shirts are required for the men in some restaurants.  Ladies are expected to dress accordingly.   Always bring a sweater or shawl – the AC does get cranked up at times).

The next day started with breakfast back at Cassanova’s before our training session.  A fresh omelet/eggs to order station AND a French toast station along with the standards.  I was thrilled to find bagels (along with a toaster) and lox – one of my breakfast favorites to go along with my egg white and spinach omelet!

After training we took  a walking tour of the venue.

Main pool view from an oceanview room

While the Royal Bahamian Resort is a large property it doesn’t take long to walk to anywhere you need to go.  The gardens are lush and the main pool is huge with a swim up bar.  Comfortable lounge chairs are available as are  beach sized towels.  Some of the activities that are included: tennis, volleyball, a gym,  snorkeling, day time scuba diving, kayaks, Hobie Cat or Sunfish sailing, and aquatrykes.  The beach has recently been made larger (in response to guest input) and also has lounge chairs and umbrellas.

From the pier you can take a shuttle boat to Sandals Cay a private island that offers beaches on either side of the island, a restaurant (open several evenings for dining), and a zen garden and spa.

Speaking of food – there are 10 different places to eat at the resort including an authentic English Pub and Kimonos – a sushi and tepanyaki style Asian restaurant.

Listen to the ocean as you enjoy a his & her message on the pier.

Still need to ease the stress of your wedding away?  Try any of many services offered at the on-site Red Lane spa including free use of their steam room and spa pool.

Dinner for our group that evening was served out on the patio overlooking the ocean.  Again the menu was chosen for us but I’m not complaining!  Zucchini risotto with seared scallop, green salad with crumbled cheese and caramelized walnuts, champagne sorbet, rack of lamb and red snapper for the main course ending with fruited pound cake & wedding cake!

Check out and return to the airport was as stress free as my arrival (HINT: Put your suitcases in the hall the night before you leave if you have an early morning flight to avoid the 5:00am knock at the door).  My bag and the shuttle were waiting for me when I got to the entrance and it was an easy ride back to the airport for check in.  You’ll go through Immigrations again and then US customs before you leave the Bahamas so you don’t have to go through customs when you get home.

While on site I was surprised to see couples of all ages.  While there were many shiny new wedding rings there were also couples of varying ages such as a couple from Spain celebrating their 25th wedding anniversary with friends from England.

Destination weddings at a Sandals (or Beaches, or Royal Plantation, or Grand Pineapple) resort are available as are decor packages courtesy of their new partnership with Martha Stewart.

If you’re interested in booking your honeymoon at any Sandals resort you can do so on your own through the ATB website or call me!  I’ll ask you some questions and then hook you up with Kay who knows pretty much everything there is to know about every resort that Sandals offers (there are 12 Sandals resorts on 4 different islands and that doesn’t include the 3 other brands).  If you’re the parents of the bride or groom don’t you think you deserve a vacation after all the wedding hoopla is over??  Or how about a girls trip – there are BFF trips  or I can help you plan your own! (HINT: You need to be 18 or older to stay at any Sandals property.  The Beaches resorts  are for families with children)

Having been to the Sandals Royal Bahamian Resort for a very short time I can still truly say – “It IS better in the Bahamas!”

Blog, Blog, Blog

If you’ve ever received a postcard from All the Best Weddings & Celebrations or viewed one of our print ads you’ve seen this picture of a wedding cake with a bride and groom sitting on one of the layers with the phrase “Because planning your event should be a piece of cake!”

In trying to keep with the cake idea I’ve started the “bites and pieces” concept for the All the Best Wedding Blog.  It was almost “bytes” to go with the cyber aspect and it might change (all input here greatly appreciated) – stay tuned.

The postings on Bites and Pieces may expand upon those that I make on Facebook or Twitter or they may be something totally different. If you’re not an ATB Facebook fan – now’s the time to become one! I’ll be letting you know through the ATB Facebook Fan page when new a Bites and Pieces is posted.

So if you’ve been reading the ATB Wedding Blog all along – now you know why all the titles have changed and some of the postings are a little different from their original versions. If this is your first time to the blog WELCOME!! and don’t be a stranger. I’m always interested in your feedback and look forward to hearing from each and every one of you! So take a “bite” (read one or two postings) or eat the whole “piece” (read them all!).  I’m looking forward to hearing from you!!

Is it Better to Give Then to Receive???

I started out as a proponent of receiving lines.  As a guest at a wedding a few years ago I was very disappointed that there was no receiving line.  I thought that was just plain rude!

Up until a few weeks (and weddings) ago I would always recommend a receiving line when asked.  TheKnot.com says that etiquette dictates that you should have a receiving line if you have over 50 guests. Emily Post mentions “if you have one” in some of her posts.

The main reason I changed my mind is because a receiving line can be very time consuming and sometimes time is not your friend.   The Association of Bridal Consultants Professional Development Program says to allocate 20 seconds per guest for a receiving line.   If you have 150 guests that’s 50 minutes.

My new mindset takes into consideration where the ceremony takes place vs where the reception will be held; how long of a break there is between the two;  and if the bride and groom will be seeing each other before the ceremony for pictures.  Even if you do a receiving line, not everyone will have made it to the ceremony, so the bride and groom may still feel obligated to visit each table. Whether you do a receiving line or not the bride and groom  should make every effort to greet each guest whether after the ceremony or during the reception.

IMHO I present the following scenarios for your consideration:

(1) If the bride and groom saw each other before the ceremony, and the wedding is off site from the reception, and there is more than 2 hours between the end of the ceremony and the beginning of cocktail hour and the venue is less then a 1/2 from the ceremony and there are less than 150 guests at the church – go for the receiving line.

(2) Given the same situation above but the bride and groom did not see each other before the ceremony a receiving line is still doable depending on how much you want to get done before cocktail hour starts (or finishes). Figure an hour for the receiving line, another 1/2 hour back inside the church for pictures, another 1/2 hour for the trip to the picturesque site for bride and groom portraits.  That’s 2 hours right there assuming that everyone is ready for their picture when called.  If it takes another 1/2 hour to get to the reception venue then you’ll probably have time to enjoy part of your cocktail hour with your guests.  If there is  less than 2 hours between the end of the ceremony and the beginning of cocktail hour a receiving line can still be done with the knowledge that the bride and groom probably won’t make cocktail hour at all.

(3)  If your ceremony and reception are at the same site and the conclusion of the ceremony is the signal to start cocktail hour then seriously consider not having a receiving line especially if the bride and groom did not see each other before the ceremony.  That hour will go by very quickly and the newlyweds will have no time to enjoy cocktail hour. They may even  delay introductions which will then cut into the time allotted for dinner and dancing.

(4)  Given scenarios 1 and 2.  If you have over 200 guests at the ceremony I’d vote a big “no” for the receiving line even if there’s more than 2 hours in between.  It would take the last people in line over an hour to get out of the church and that’s way too long for anyone to stand in line.

So answer this – Is it better to give (yourself a break and some extra time) then to receive (the well wishes of your guests when you’ll see them all in a few hours at the party)?  Can’t wait to hear what you think!